Back in control

oh my god! I feel so bloated after today! Thank god I am starting that thing tomorrow! I need to get back in control, I really dont care if it means taking my adderal everyday and I have to do math questions. I don't care. This isnt about my comfort. This about getting back in control. I really want to loose 10 pounds in 10 days. Jessica simpson recently did it with eating and ecercising, so I figure I can do the same...but without eating. I just have to stay in my room and not eat! I mean I need to control my cravings! Who cares if I feel empty? I need to learn to control those cravings. Well, I have made a little one way deal with myself. And, it is that, I am going to weigh myself friday, and it the number on the scale doesnt say 108(thats what I weighed the last day of school but now I probably weigh 112 or 113), then I am going to have to make myself puke 3 times. Then that night I will turn the air conditioner on high, and sleep wearing nothing with no covers so I can freeze my ass off. Maybe that will teach me a lesson. Also, I think its bull how people say calories are obsorbed in your mouth. So if the cravings become unbearable, then I will chew and spit like I used to. Now that I think about it...the chewing and spitting really seemed to work. That was when I was most in control and at my lowest weight. So yeah. This week I am going to do what ever it takes. And if I do end up loosing 10 pounds, then that would mean I will be less than 108, but the scale better at the least say 108. I think I am also going to0 start wearing a rubber band around my wrist and snapping it when I am hungry. People say that actually works. So I am going to try it. Also, I may not go on the computer for a bit to control cravings.